Christmas Eve Dinner (Paris #2)

So, Kadija has a model friend named Mahady.

The story goes, when Kadija was in NY going out for calls, she met this girl whose call sheet basically mirrored hers. So they went out together to all of the calls and have been good friends ever since. Oh yeah, she she speaks very little English (and not European “I-can-conjugate-verbs-but-not-speak-good-English” very little English, but for real she only knows a few words in English (more than my German though)). Anyways, she was nice enough to open her home to us for Christmas Eve Dinner.

First Course:

Mahady and her family are French, but hail from one of those African countries whose colonizers spoke French. Anyways, when they offer you an opaque-brown liquid in a bottle with no label, you know you’re in for some isht you’ve never tasted before. I know my description won’t do the taste any justice but it was very sugary and tasted like some African fruit that I’ve never seen or tasted before and you can only get in that country…and the only way you knew there was alcohol in there was from the look on their faces when they offered you some. I wouldn’t say I was ga-ga about the taste, but it wasn’t bad at all. It was one of those drinks that had two distinct “during-” and “after-“ tastes. I rode out with the cup they poured me the whole night.

Second Course:

Now these WERE THE BOMB. They poured these in a wooden bowl (the size of a cereal bowl) and it took all my druthers (and Kadija) to stop me from eating these straight from the bag (much less finishing the bowl). I don’t know if they have these in the States but I HAVE to get my hands on some (Josh, you’re up on these type of things, what’s the deal with these State-side?). Of note, along with this were a bowl of small cut-up pieces of three different types of uncooked sausages/pepperoni (of which I ate about 2 or 3 pieces) and a bowl of crackers (which I didn’t eat).

Third Course:

Just your regular salad with a creamy dressing similar to Ranch. I crushed this and ate Kadija’s tomatoes (I like this picture of the table by the way).

Fourth Course:

OK.

Pancakes. Regular silver-dollar sized pancakes.

Smoked Salmon. The same lox that you throw on a bagel with some cream cheese.

The Pink Spread. Man, I don’t know what that stuff is but I was told that you’re supposed to spread it on the pancakes…and like a good little boy I did. I can’t tell you about it’s taste cause I ate it in combination with everything else on the plate, but the good thing is that it didn’t detract from any of the other foods.

The Blood Sausage. Yeah, they actually use the blood of a pig or something and cook it with some refried bean consistency stuffing (but its more coarse). You’re not supposed to eat the skin, so I pulled it back and just ate it in combination with everything else on the plate (dude, I was hungry by the time we got to Mahady’s cause I hadn’t eaten anything since lunch with the Paris valuation office). Again, I can’t tell you its specific taste cause I ate it in tandem with everything else on the plate. But what sticks out was its consistency (and this holds true for the smoked salmon and pink spread). But I’ll get to that later.

Fifth Course:
Duck "Pâté"
(sorry, no picture here)

“WAIT!!!! Don’t you dare call it pâté!” Why do you ask. Well, according to Mahady’s sister, pâté is what you call a pâté-looking dish where you don’t know its contents or its contents are a myriad of meats. When you know what it is, as in duck, you call it...I forget. Anyways, for those unfamiliar with pâté-like dishes, it basically has the consistency of hard cream cheese (in look and feel in your mouth), but the taste and process to get it are completely different. As it was told to us, they basically gorge a duck until it dies, then take its remains (don’t ask me which remains cause I don’t remember…and even if I wrote this the next day (which I had planned to but the internet went out in the hotel room on Christmas day) I wouldn’t have remembered) and grind it up (I believe) and make the dish. As for the taste, it’s about 1.5-times thicker than cheese and has more complexity in terms of what you actually taste as you’re chewing. I hope that helps and I really wish I had a picture but I don’t.

Sixth Course:
Roast Leg of Lamb
(again...sorry no picture here)

Unfortunately, by the time we got to this dish, it was around like 10:30pm and both Kadija and I were full…so we left (got a ride home from Mahady and her sister) before this dish was even served. Trust me, we did NOT leave because we just couldn’t take the food anymore, we were just full and tired. Furthermore, I’m sure the consistency of this dish would have agreed with my palette the most of all the prior two courses…which brings me to the conclusion.

The consistency of French cuisine is more foreign to me than its taste. Nothing from this dinner tasted b, but I’m not sure I’m in agreeance with how it feels in my mouth. I’m sorry, I’m used to solids that I then use my teeth to break down. It seems, from my limited experience with real French food, that many of their dishes (from cheese to the dishes experienced at Mahady’s house) have this pasty or creamy consistency (even escargot is on some other stuff). I’m sorry, it’s just not my cup of tea. As a result, it’s hard for me to separate the taste (which I’m sure many-a-culinary aficionados would tell me is exquisite) from the feel. I mean, if you were a milk lover, I bet you wouldn’t drink a cup that looked green or brown. That’s what I’m getting at…real French cuisine is on that next level…where taste transcends what you actually put in your mouth. And I'm not enough of a foodie (yet...?) to "free my mind."

Cheers.

Sidebar: Mahady’s boyfriend is super cool and a buyer for Nike Stores all throughout France. Dude looks like he should be playing European league basketball (and I think he used to or something), but that’s not the point(s)…there are two. One: The Nokia N series phone that he had was OFFICIAL! It was basically an iPhone without a Qwerty keyboard and all the hype. It had just as many gigs and a sleek hardware to match. Looking for a new phone…don’t sleep, do your research. Two: The next Jordans (the 23’s) will be the last Jordans produced. And according to dude, they are SICK! The story, as I remember it, is that they are bringing back Tinker Hatfield--who was the designer of the Jordan 3’s through the Jordan 15’s (as well as the 20's). Ask about (or google) ‘em.